Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Wednesday, July 8. All times are Eastern.
Key & Peele (Comedy Central, 10 p.m.): Key & Peele is back for season five, with a premiere that asks the always relevant question: “Y’all Ready For This?” “This” might be the barrage of viral sketches to come with this new season of laughs, but it’s really too soon to tell. It could just as easily be asking a question about Jock Jams. LaToya Ferguson takes on reviewing duties this season, and she is absolutely ready for whatever “this” might be. In fact she’s so ready she’s already drunk with the power of being so ready. Key & Peele. Is. Her. Shit.
Another week, another reason to wonder what exactly ABC Family is doing with its hit sitcoms. This week, it because of ABC Family’s “Flash Forward Wednesday” gimmick. What is that? Imagine that TGIF line-up in 1997 when Salem from Sabrina The Teenage Witch swallowed a “time ball” and caused time travel in each show. It’s that, only without Salem.
One of these days, we really need to have a conversation about what Melissa Joan Hart is trying to do to television.
Melissa & Joey (ABC Family, 8 p.m.): Proof that Melissa Joan Hart is up to something? “Mel and Joe get stuck in a ski avalanche and are frozen for 100 years. When they thaw, they head to their home to find 120-year-old Lennox and Zander married. Mel and Joe want to resume their lives but discover the Big Brother government won’t let them stay married and has already picked out the ‘perfect’ new mates for them.” When your grandchildren ask you about television in 2015—because you have very detail-oriented grandchildren—you tell them about this. You tell them about all of this.
Baby Daddy (ABC Family, 8:30 p.m.): Next, we have the less insane version of all of that, as Ben has “a panic attack about his future,” and flashes forward to a terrible world where everyone in his life who helps him raise his daughter… ends up raising his daughter. The only difference here is that he’s no longer alive in this world, which really sounds more like a self-centered thing than him worrying about his daughter’s well-being. Now if there were a ski avalanche involved, we’d be on to something.
The Spoils Before Dying (IFC, 9 p.m.): Emily Stephens will be covering this sequel to The Spoils Of Babylon as it airs, but you can read a pre-air review from Dennis Perkins right now. Speaking of Dennis Perkins…
Why? With Hannibal Buress (Comedy Central, 10:30 p.m.): …he will also be covering the premiere of Hannibal Buress’ new Comedy Central series about current events. That all erases everything you just read about ABC Family, right? If not, we’re sorry. Sort of.
WWE NXT (WWE Network, 8 p.m.)
Mr. Robot (USA, 10 p.m.)
Deutschland 83 (Sundance, 11 p.m.)
Unfortunately for all of you only children out there, TV Club’s Siblings Week continues, with an Inventory of 24 actors who played convincing siblings. But if you want to feel a little less left out, Alex McCown has reviewed Andy Samberg and Kit Harington’s “ridiculous” tennis movie for HBO, 7 Days In Hell. There’s something for everyone.
Big Brother (CBS, 8 p.m.): This week on Big Brother, we learn that we were the real Big Brother all along. Probably. Ask Melissa & Joey.
MasterChef (Fox, 8 p.m): In “Gordon’s Greatest Hits,” the remaining chefs find themselves in a “taste-it-and-make-it-challenge,” competing to recreate Chef Ramsay’s “signature” Beef Wellington. Which chef will truly achieve complete and total Beef Mode? And why isn’t Fox using “Beef Mode” on all their official copy for this episode of MasterChef?
Suits (USA, 9 p.m.): “Harvey (Gabriel Macht) brings some star power to his ongoing conflict with Jack Soloff (guest star John Pyper Ferguson)” If that “star power” doesn’t end up being any of Gabriel Macht’s co-stars from The Spirit, then Suits should just close up shop. Even Eric Balfour will do.
Celebrity Wife Swap (ABC, 10 p.m): If you can imagine that this wife swap between Cloris Leachman and Pia Zadora is a lost episode of Raising Hope, you might just have the best episode of television in 2015.
Extant (CBS, 10 p.m.): “Molly and JD discover another pregnant woman suffering from inexplicable and fatal symptoms, while Molly begins to question her own mental stability.” Come on, Molly! Get it together! Extant!
Neighbors (HBO, 8 p.m.): Say, how do you feel about Zac Efron?
Wild Wild West (VH1, 8 p.m.): Say, how do you feel about giant spiders?
Tour de France: Stage 5 (NBC Sports, 8 p.m.)
MLB Baseball: Cardinals at Cubs (ESPN, 8 p.m.)
MLB Baseball: Marlins at Red Sox (FSN, 7 p.m.)
MLB Baseball: Rays at Royals (Sun Sports, 8 p.m.)
Ring Of Honor (Destination America, 8 p.m.)
Lucha Underground (El Rey, 8 p.m.)
Impact Wrestling (Destination America, 9 p.m.)
Inside Amy Schumer: Inside Amy Schumer’s season has ended. Long live Inside Amy Schumer’s season.