Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Wednesday, December 30. All times are Eastern.
Mozart In The Jungle (Amazon, midnight): In his pre-air review for the second season of Amazon’s Mozart In The Jungle, Vikram Murthi (who also reviewed the entire first season) noted that the show “plays some passionate new notes in its confident second season.” Now you can all see for yourselves, all thanks to the magic of streaming services. If you haven’t gotten a chance to watch Mozart In The Jungle yet, now you’re super behind. New York! Symphony orchestra! Behind-the-scenes! Classical music! It’s all there for you to binge watch, so just hurry up and do it. If you are caught up: Go ahead and take your time.
The Challenge: Battle Of The Bloodlines (MTV, 10 / 11 p.m.): Two episodes of The Challenge. No waiting. Yes, you asked for it—someone asked for it—and now you’re going to get it. “A House Divided” and “Dirty Little Secret,” back-to-back. Veterans! Rookies! Run-ins! Lack of communication! Loyalty! This is what The Challenge is all about people!
Team Ninja Warrior (Esquire Network, 11 p.m.): Here, have a preview of the newest season (well, spin-off) of American Ninja Warrior, Team Ninja Warrior. We’re assuming it’s like standard American Ninja Warrior… but with teams. You’re welcome.
What do we got? We got pre-air reviews! Fox, we’re coming for you… brotha. Danette Chavez’s pre-air review of the animated show Bordertown addresses the series’ lack of focus, even going as far as to call it “a poor echo of Family Guy.” Over in the live-action side of things, Noel Murray’s pre-air review of Cooper Barrett’s Guide To Surviving Life succinctly describes the “bro comedy” as “blah.” So get excited for the return of network TV, guys!
If you want something more positive on your New Year’s Eve Eve reading list, then try this Inventory about… batteries. We promise it’s much more in-depth (and fun) than it sounds!
I Get That A Lot (CBS, 8 p.m.): Oh, this is still a show? We could have sworn it was a show on Fox circa 2003 that competed with ABC’s Are You Hot? But apparently it’s— Well, it’s not. It was a show on CBS in 2010, 2012, and 2013, actually; there was really no regularity with which the show existed, it appears. Anyway, this “one-hour special presentation” of I Get That A Lot continues the totally hilarious adventures of “popular celebrities pranking everyday people.” Kristin Chenoweth! Guy Fieri! Rita Ora! Aaron Rodgers! Alex Trebek! Cody Simpson! Stupid “everyday people!”
My Fat Saved My Life (TLC, 8 p.m.): “People who escaped death because of their weight, including a person who fell from a tall building and another who was shot, are profiled.” Yep, sounds like a show on TLC.
Alaskan Bush People (Discovery Channel, 9 p.m.): The Alaskan Bush People fourth season finale is “Alarmed & Dangerous,” and this week, “Browntown receives visitors.” That’s a poop joke posing as a synopsis, right?
My Crazy Ex (Lifetime Movie Network, 9 p.m.): What are the chances of this being as good as Crazy Ex-Girlfriend? Not high? Yep—the episode is titled “Scrooged, Used & Abused,” after all. It’s the second season premiere of this show, and it “includes a woman who finds herself in handcuffs after a Christmas celebration; a sister who apologizes in the form of a new boyfriend; and a woman that rushes to save her man who believes in giving until it hurts.” Just catch up on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend if you have the chance.
In Defense Of Food (PBS, 9 p.m.): Apparently food needs to be defended, and PBS was the only one to get the memo on that. So “join Michael Pollan on a fascinating journey to find out what we should eat to be healthy.” Or just join in on the war on food. Whatever you do, pick a damn side!
Extreme Time Cheaters (TLC, 9 p.m.): “Time-saving measures, including washing dishes while showering and body waxing at work, are examined.” Now that’s what we call learning!
Going Deep With David Rees (Esquire Network, 10 p.m.): Take notes, college-aged boys—David Rees is going to teach you “How To Do The Dishes,” season finale style.
I Love You… But I Lied (Lifetime Movie Network, 10 p.m.): Lifetime Movie Network is apparently at least two seasons into having more than just Lifetime movies, if the second season premiere of I Love You… But I Lied is any indication. So the alternative is television shows with Lifetime movie premises! In “Psych/Sick” (which sounds like a Psych/Monk crossover if you ask your friendly neighborhood What’s On Tonight contributor)… We have no idea, because TV Guide Dude decided to call this “To Be Announced.” Wait, what if Lifetime Movie Network is pulling an Adult Swim?!?
Men Women Wild (Discovery Channel, 10 p.m.): Can’t get enough Men Women Wild? Then check out “Unveiled,” a bonus episode with “interviews with contestants from the previous season” and “never-before seen footage.” Then you’ll have enough and can stop talking about it.
House Hunters (HGTV, 10 p.m.): “Family Dukes It Out Over Style In Dallas.” Well, duh. Dukes Of Hazzard and Dallas are really two aggressively different aesthetics.
Rich In Faith (Oxygen, 10 p.m.): “DC proves her worth by leading a church conference and cooking up a tasty chicken piccata. Elsewhere, Rich’s father sets out to convince him to invest in a dilapidated Buddhist church.” Classic DC! Classic Rich!
Bet On Me (TLC, 10 p.m.): What’s Bet On Me, you ask? That’s easy! It’s a “game show in which contestants guess details about strangers’ lives to win prizes.” Some of us call that just normal people watching, but what do we know?!?
Rev Runs Around The World (Travel Channel, 10 / 10:30 p.m.): First up: “Rev and his family see Copenhagen through the eyes of a 7-year-old child.” Who know Rev Runs Around The World was an arthouse show? Then: “Rev and his family go on a Roman holiday.” Question: Is WWE Superstar Roman Reigns said seven year old from the first episode? Comment with “tater tots” if you think so.
House Hunters International (HGTV, 10:30 p.m.): “A Canadian Leaves Her Family And Career To Follow Her Heart And Fiance To Bergamo, Italy.” Wow. Are all House Hunters International episodes titled like this?
The Mighty Ducks (NickToons, 9:30 p.m.): Quack, quack, etc.
St. Vincent (Showtime Comedy West, 8:15 p.m.): Bill Murray, Bill Murray, etc.
Birmingham Bowl: Auburn vs. Memphis (ESPN, 12 p.m.)
Holiday Bowl: USC vs. Wisconsin (ESPN, 10:30 p.m.)
Belk Bowl: NC State vs. Mississippi State (ESPN, 3:30 p.m.)
Music City Bowl: Texas A&M vs. Louisville (ESPN, 7 p.m.)
College Basketball: West Virginia at Virginia Tech (ESPNU, 12 p.m.)
College Basketball: Indiana at Rutgers (ESPN2, 1 p.m.)
College Basketball: Houston at South Florida (ESPNU, 2 p.m.)
College Basketball: Michigan at Illinois (ESPN2, 3 p.m.)
College Basketball: Northwestern at Nebraska (ESPNU, 4 p.m.)
College Basketball: Penn State at Maryland (ESPN2, 5 p.m.)
College Basketball: Oakland at Virginia (ESPNU, 6 p.m.)
College Basketball: Clemson at North Carolina (ESPN2, 7 p.m.)
College Basketball: Seton Hall at Marquette (FS1, 7 p.m.)
College Basketball: Arkansas at Dayton (CBS Sports, 8 p.m.)
College Basketball: Syracuse at Pittsburgh (ESPN2, 9 p.m.)
College Basketball: Georgetown at DePaul (FS1, 9 p.m.)
College Basketball: Wyoming at San Diego State (CBS Sports, 10 p.m.)
College Basketball: Fresno State at UNLV (ESPNU, 11 p.m.)
Barclays Premier League Soccer: Sunderland vs. Liverpool (NBC Sports, 3 p.m.)
NBA Basketball: Nets at Magic (FSN, 7 p.m.)
Under Armour All-America Game Practice (ESPNU, 8 p.m.)
NHL Hockey: Rangers at Lightning (NBC Sports, 8 p.m.)
NHL Hockey: Flyers at Sharks (NBC Sports, 10:30 p.m.)
WWE NXT (WWE Network, 8 p.m.)
Impact Wrestling (Destination America, 9 p.m.): By the way, this is the last airing of Impact Wrestling on Destination America. Leave the memories alone.
Ring Of Honor (Comet TV, midnight)
Girlfriends’ Guide To Divorce: Last week, Girlfriends’ Guide To Divorce perfectly depicted the dissolution of a marriage. This week, Gwen Ihnat’s review discusses how “sometimes mean girls have a purpose.” And she’s not talking Lindsay Lohan, people.