Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Wednesday, Jan. 25. All times are Eastern.

Touch (Fox, 9 p.m.):
Though it’s kind of goofy and definitely schlocky, this Fox series has an intriguing pilot that we, nonetheless, enjoyed watching, and we’re hoping that it has a first season to match the… oh, it’s from Tim Kring? Creator of Heroes Tim Kring? Listen, maybe he can… no, you’re right. He has trouble telling more than one story. So, anyway, tune in for the pilot tonight, and if you like it, you can expect rapidly diminishing returns when the show actually debuts in March. Todd VanDerWerff and Ryan McGee will have further thoughts later today.


American Idol (Fox, 8 p.m.):
Auditions head to Aspen, which is, of course, known as the city of broken dreams, in addition to its identity as the place everybody goes to ski. Claire Zulkey had a million dreams shattered on the mean streets of Aspen.

Top Chef (Bravo, 10 p.m.): ABC is in reruns tonight, so, uh, we’re stuck not having a lot to do. We’re going to twiddle our thumbs and wait around for Emily Withrow to finish her review of this episode, whenever that happens, then probably go to bed.


Survivor (Classic) (11 a.m.):
This episode is entitled “Death Of An Alliance,” and such a momentous occasion requires the use of all-caps. Meredith Blake will be covering “DEATH OF AN ALLIANCE” this morning. You should bring tissues.

Carnivàle (1 p.m.): So, hey, what’s up with the World War I bear? Also, how many shows can you say that about? We can really only think of this one and Rhoda, and Todd VanDerWerff knows the World War I bear in Rhoda was Carlton the Doorman.


Alias (3 p.m.): Come for Ryan McGee’s excellent dissection of one of the best seasons of TV of the last 20 years; stay for the awesome screencap of Jack Bristow with a mustache that adorns this article. You must see Victor Garber with a ‘stache.

Street Foods International (Travel, 8 p.m.):
Travel Channel has apparently just turned this time slot into the “eating weird foods while we travel around” time slot, as this week, we’re headed to the ends of the earth for baby frog legs and shawarma.


Hell Roads (Discovery, 9 p.m.): provides no description of what this show is about, which means Discovery must not have shipped it over, which means we get to make it up! This is a show about truckers who work for Satan. Awesome.

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street (TCM, 9 p.m.): If you’ve never seen the Broadway version of this show, complete with TCM’s starlet of the month, Angela Lansbury, here’s a filmed version of it to educate you on rotating set pieces.

Inside Nature’s Giants (PBS, 10 p.m.): This sounds like a show we would have come up with: “Okay, we’re going to take big, giant animals, and then we’re going to show you all the gross stuff inside of them. And then, we’re going to cover you in it!”


Undercover Brother (BET, 8 p.m.): We remember laughing at this blaxploitation spoof, but it was back when it came out, and we were in college, and we’re not sure we can recommend this with a clear conscience, but recommend we shall.

Arlington Road (Fox Movie Channel, 9:30 p.m.): This movie has a twist ending so ludicrous and so unbelievable that we like to imagine even M. Night Shyamalan looks at it and says, “Well, hey, at least I didn’t do anything that egregious…”

College Basketball: Duke at Maryland (ESPN, 9 p.m.): Hm. Duke is usually pretty good, and Maryland’s mascot is a turtle, so we’re pretty sure ESPN was justified in giving this game the marquee slot. We couldn’t tell you if that’s so, however.


Justified (Tuesday):
Look out, everybody! Carla Gugino is back in town, and she’s playing a character who’s Karen Sisco in every sense but legally! Make sure you check out Karen “Goodall’s” debut, and then stick around for Scott Tobias’ thoughts.