Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi

A guide to what we’re barely putting up with this week.

Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi
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Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi

Netflix’s thoroughly engrossing crime documentary, Making A Murderer. It’s all the intrigue of The Jinx and Serial without all the distractions of Andrew Jarecki reaction shots and MailKimp ads.

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Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi

Coffee-Mate’s special edition Star Wars coffee creamers. Just because everything can have a Star Wars tie-in doesn’t mean everything should.

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Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi
Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi
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Miley Cyrus’ video for “BB Talk.” All the adult diapers and giant baby dancers in the world aren’t enough to distract from the droning, open-mic-night-level spoken word.

Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi
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The annual onslaught of nonsensical perfume ads. It’s that magical time of year when models roll around on the ground, Natalie Portman jilts some dude at the altar, and Charlize Theron drops from the ceiling on a golden ribbon all in the hope of making you smell like a mall.

Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi
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Ads for real-life Moby-Dick movie, In the Heart Of The Sea. A.k.a. The Untold Story Behind The Book You Pretended To Read In High School.

Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi
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Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi

The Miss Universe pageant. Every year, the universe convenes a panel of random pop culture has-beens to determine once and for all which country is the best at contouring noses and cheekbones.

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Illustration for article titled This week we’re barely putting up with the return of Crystal Pepsi

The completely unnecessary return of the short-lived early-’90s almost-Sprite, Crystal Pepsi. Mmm. A drinkable anachronism.

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