Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

The Following ends its season in typically preposterous fashion

Illustration for article titled The Following ends its season in typically preposterous fashion

Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Monday, April 29. All times are Eastern.

The Following (Fox, 9 p.m.): After a full season of people dying in gruesome, completely inexplicable fashion, of computer servers hidden in S&M clubs, of true love being thwarted by one partner being a serial killer, of the world’s weirdest love triangle, of a small boy being smarter than any of the regular characters, and of Kevin Bacon, The Following comes to an end with an episode that asks who will win? Joe or Ryan? Well, since this is an ongoing series, doesn’t Joe sort of have to win? David Sims hopes this isn’t some sort of “one serial killer per season” show. That would be pretty dumb.

How I Met Your Mother (CBS, 8 p.m.): It’s time for Barney’s bachelor party, and we’re wondering if, hey, might Ted meet the mother this season? Might season nine be all about their courtship or something? Donna Bowman daren’t hope. For now, she’s just excited for the arrival of “The Bro Mitzvah.” Hooray!


Defiance (Syfy, 9 p.m.): A great many of you have read about this post-apocalyptic “humans and aliens, together at last!” series for the past two weeks, so we’re adding it to the coverage roster, because in a couple of weeks, there will be no one left. Only Rowan Kaiser will walk the barren desolation of TV Club.

RuPaul’s Drag Race (Logo, 9 p.m.): Tonight’s episode is a clip show, so we won’t be covering it. But we wanted to let you know that it existed, but Oliver Sava won’t have anything to say about stuff he’s already covered in the past. In honor of the clip show, why not paste your favorite comments below?

Bates Motel (A&E, 10 p.m.): The only thing that could make this weird, wacky show even better would be if… well, speak of the devil! It’s Jere Burns! And he’s just the latest in a long string of creepy creepers who are going to make Norma and Norman Bates’ lives a living hell. Todd VanDerWerff feels the Burns.

Rectify (Sundance, 10 p.m.): The connection between Daniel and Tawney grows. We’re a little weirded out by a character named Tawney not being a tiger, but Erik Adams assures us that if we just paid attention to the series’ mythology, we’d realize everybody was a tiger. What a great twist, Rectify!


Revolution (NBC, 10 p.m.): Couldn’t this show have come up with a cooler name for its big, important destination than The Tower? It just sounds like the characters are trying to make their way to a mid-range Hyatt in Knoxville, Tennessee every time Les Chappell hears them blabbing about “The Tower.”

Peep Show (11 a.m.): This week’s episodes include everybody getting excited about a weekend getaway in something called “the Quantocks.” This must be one of those weird British things, like that’s the British equivalent of Universal Studios or Gatorland or something. Phil Dyess-Nugent loves Gatorland.


Batman: The Animated Series (1 p.m.): “Beware The Creeper!” says this week’s episode title, and we’re sad it doesn’t scan better to “Don’t Fear The Reaper,” because we love the shit out of that song. Oliver Sava requests more cowbell, right before he feels too bad that this feature will be over next week.

Bones (Fox, 8 p.m.): Another season, another finale for Bones, which will outlive us all. This time around, we’re sure that somebody will find some bones, and they’ll lead to a criminal, and then people will banter sexily. Nothing wrong with that, we suppose. If the formula works, hey, the formula works.


The Big C (Showtime, 10 p.m.): We’re dropping coverage of this show just in time for its final four-episode (yes, you read that correctly, four episodes) order to play out. Since this is a show about a woman suffering from cancer, it can end in only one way: with her deciding to make crystal meth.

Teen Mom 2 (MTV, 10 p.m.): It’s the end of the road for the teen moms, and many tears will be shed, many sniffles sniffled. Genevieve Koski, longtime fan of MTV’s most venerable reality franchises, checks in to learn the answer to one question: Which teen moms will live, and which teen moms will die?!


Warehouse 13 (Syfy, 10 p.m.): We’ve gotta give this show some props, because its female lead was in our beloved Slings And Arrows, and the whole show is one of only two in the history of television (that we’re aware of) to be set in our home state of South Dakota. And it takes place in a giant warehouse!

Seeking A Friend For The End Of The World (Cinemax, 8:15 p.m.): Important lesson for all you earnestly dorky guys out there: If the world starts to end, you could totally get Keira Knightley—or just someone who looks like Keira Knightley—to fall in love with you. So keep watching the skies. For asteroids.


Prometheus (HBO, 9 p.m.): This movie is all about how Jesus was an alien. That’s what we got out of it, at least, and we read some guy’s LiveJournal, and he got that, too. Oh, and also, there’s this scene where a woman cuts an organism out of herself, and it’s pretty great. Shame about the rest of the movie…

MLB Baseball: Nationals at Braves (ESPN, 7 p.m.): The Braves are the big story of the young baseball season, and they’ve been playing some fantastic baseball. The Nationals—one of the big stories of last season—have mostly disappointed. Still, they’re right behind the Braves in the NL East, so who knows?


Vikings (Sunday): Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. Vikings to Vikings. The first season of America’s favorite Viking-themed entertainment came to an end with an overstuffed finale that, nevertheless, left Dennis Perkins super excited for whatever Viking action the History Channel can cook up in the second season.


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