Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Wednesday, December 3. All times are Eastern.
Arrow (The CW, 8 p.m.): The two night crossover extravaganza—not to be confused with the two night, three show, Dick Wolf crossover extravaganza—continues. Last night, The Flash gave us all the gift that keeps on giving with “Flash Vs. Arrow,” and now it continues in “The Brave And The Bold.” Let’s all just take a moment to truly think about the fact that we are now living in a world in which both the Green Arrow and Flash have their own headlining TV shows, and now those shows are crossing over. Then keep holding that moment, because The CW—you know, that network people still try to pretend is simply all pretty people, all the time, as though that’s actually an insult—really is the best network for genre television. Alasdair Wilkins can hardly believe it all himself, and he gets to write about Arrow on a weekly basis.
Christmas In Rockefeller Center (NBC, 8 p.m.) / Saturday Night Live Christmas (NBC, 9 p.m.): If you prefer “real” Christmas to Nerd Christmas, you can watch the 82nd annual tree-lighting gala (complete with Seth MacFarlane and other important musicians) and then an assortment of Saturday Night Live Christmas sketches and commercials, like this, this, and this. That’s it. That’s all the network has going on tonight. Wow, when you say it like that, that’s kind of a sad thing to think about. Surely there are some 30 Rock Christmas episodes that can fill the void created by this “tragesty.”
Survivor (CBS, 8 p.m.): Tonight, there are two back-to-back new episodes Survivor, “Kind Of Like Cream Cheese” and “Still Holdin’ On.” Consider it CBS’ Christmas present to all of us before an all new Stalker. Carrie Raisler welcomes two hours of Survivor—it’s simply more research for the day she finally becomes The A.V. Club’s lone survivor.
Modern Family (ABC, 9 p.m.): As the weeks go by, and Modern Family continues on as the immortal force it truly is, one thing sticks out more than anything else: Alex Dunphy’s life has become so terrible that it’s really difficult to get any comedic value out of it. So this week, the A-plot is dedicated to Phil and Claire suspecting that Alex’s boyfriend is something she made up because they’ve put too much pressure on her. Joshua Alston doesn’t understand how they can put pressure on a child they barely remember exists, but he’ll allow it—he wants to see how this thing plays out.
American Horror Story: Freak Show (FX, 10 p.m.): What’s that? It’s a “Blood Bath”? This is probably one of the most perfect time for a Fill In The Easy Joke competition about that episode title. Feel free to do that yourself while you wait for Emily L. Stephens’ review.
The 100 (The CW, 9 p.m.)
Black-ish (ABC, 9:30 p.m)
Top Chef (Bravo, 10 p.m.)
South Park (Comedy Central, 10 p.m.)
Key & Peele (Comedy Central, 10:30 p.m.)
Lost (Classic) (1 p.m.): Last week, Myles McNutt made terrible jokes about the titles of this week’s Lost (Classic) episodes, “?” and “Three Minutes.” This week, he’ll probably do the same thing, but that’s why we love him. Plus, it keeps things light in the middle of all that death, you know?
Nashville (ABC, 10 p.m.): There are apparently “Two Sides To Every Story,” and just from that title alone, one can only assume this episode will either bust the conspiracy of Rayna James winning every (let alone any) award at the Nashville-sanctioned CMA Awards wide open, or it will try to pretend that Rayna James was just overreacting all those times she dumped a drunk, surly Deacon Claybourne. Sure, there are episodes descriptions to settle such assumptions, but those always run the risk of mentioning Scarlett’s black homeless man.
The Game (BBC America, 10 p.m.): Thanks to the holidays, you’ve surely made the time to catch up with BBC’s espionage mini-series, The Game. So get excited for the penultimate episode, where everyone is reeling from the revelation of the mole among them. Those damn Soviets.
Suave Says (VH1, 10 p.m.): It was only a matter of time before VH1 gave Gerardo, the man whose song,“Rico Suavo,” got most of its plays from the network’s dedication to anthologies (I Love The ‘90s) and lists (40 Greatest One-Hit Wonders, where it made number three on the list), his own reality show. Dancing With The Stars simply isn’t enough for celebrities from the D-list through the Z-list, and that’s why reality shows named after terrible songs are allowed to exist.
Web Therapy (Showtime, 11 p.m.): The description for this week’s Web Therapy features interventions, makeovers, and amnesia (oh my!). Such a beautifully odd little show.
Wicker Park (HBO, 6:30 p.m.): And now for the question that’s relevant no matter what the season: Is Wicker Park a good movie—yes or no? It’s a question almost as important as why so many people watch The Family Stone this time of year, despite a seething hatred for it. TV Guide’s opinionated synopsis writer strikes again, calling the film a “convoluted thriller.” So now we know where that guy stands.
A Nanny For Christmas (Lifetime, 8 p.m.): Christmas movies are mandatory this time of the year, so tonight’s choice for such cinematic joy (if that’s really the word that must be used) is one from 2010, A Nanny For Christmas. Emmanuelle Vaugier, Dean Cain, and Richard Ruccolo (yes, Pete from underrated classic Two Guys, A Girl, And A Pizza Place) star in this film about a high-powered advertising executive who loses her job right before the holidays and has to get a job as a former rival’s nanny. Apparently Dean Cain plays a guardian angel? Classic Superman. TV Movie Christmas gave it three and a half stars out of five, so what’s to lose? It could be worse. A lot worse.
NHL Hockey: Blues at Blackhawks (NBC Sports, 8 p.m.): It’s St. Louis at Chicago, with two teams who are kind of on a roll right now—the Blues have won four of their last five games, and the Blackhawks have won six of their last seven. The Blackhawks have CM Punk on their side as a fan, and that’s a good enough reason to root for them, even though they lost to the Blues (3-2) when they went against them back in October. Based on the sports team name theory of picking a winning team, Blackhawks have this one over Blues.
Lucha Underground (El Rey, 8 p.m.): As the only major televised wrestling promotion that be can trusted anymore—unless it’s secretly being run by those damn dirty millennials who refuse to grab “imaginary brass rings”—Lucha Underground has to maintain its greatness. That is all.
The Flash: Ah, the beauty of Nerd Christmas being two nights in a row. Scott Von Doviak praised the episode for being able to tackle the dichotomy in tones between Arrow and The Flash in this episode, which was one of the concerns about the shows’ extended universe from the moment Barry Allen first showed up in Starling City. You should check out the episode and review before the new Arrow, of course.