Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Wednesday, March 27. All times are Eastern.
Psych (USA, 10 p.m.): It’s not every day that a series hits its 100th episode, particularly a cable series, thus becoming eligible for our “100 Episodes” feature. Psych celebrates this milestone tonight in truly intriguing fashion, as it takes a break from the usual mystery mishaps to offer up an elaborate homage to the cult comedy favorite Clue. Kevin McFarland hopes that the episode has at least seven endings and that one of the endings involves all of the characters singing a song about him. But, then, Kevin McFarland has always been a big fan of musicals, so that makes a lot of sense. We’ll see you in 100 Episodes in 2018, Psych!
Arrow (The CW, 8 p.m.): We think that Oliver should move to Colorado City, Arizona, and take up a quiet life of superheroing there, particularly in the Grand Canyon, protecting mules from criminals. He could call himself the Canyon-Arrow! Alasdair Wilkins thinks that’s a long way for a bad Simpsons joke.
The Middle (ABC, 8 p.m.): After a really great run of episodes in February, The Middle settled back on its couch, contented smile on its face, and relaxed, pleased with a job well done, then took most of March off. Now, it’s back, and Will Harris hopes that Sue’s new middle name is Willharris. Sue Willharris Heck.
Survivor (CBS, 8 p.m.): This week’s episode is entitled “Tubby Lunchbox,” and it looks like we have a new champion in the “Rename What’s On Tonight” contest. From now on, this feature will be called “Tubby Lunchbox,” instead of something that accurately describes its contents. Carrie Raisler cheers with joy.
Modern Family (ABC, 9 p.m.): Most of America is just happy to have its favorite show back. But we know you, dear readers, are just happy to have Donna Bowman back from her basketball-induced hiatus, which we attempted to fill with ultimately disappointing shenanigans. May she reign forever!
Supernatural (The CW, 9 p.m.): This week’s episode is called “Freaks And Geeks,” and Phil Dyess-Nugent would like to remind you that if this show were to abruptly turn into a sequel to the much-missed series of that name, he certainly wouldn’t mind. Though he might think about playing James Franco’s part…
Suburgatory (ABC, 9:30 p.m.): Noah has moved in with Opus, and though we know what that means, we’re just going to choose to believe that he’s actually moved in with the occasionally underwear-sporting penguin from Bloom County, Outland, and Opus. Brandon Nowalk loves you, Berke Breathed.
Nashville (ABC, 10 p.m.): There’s no Americans on tonight, so a sinus-infected Todd VanDerWerff is going to try to take a “sick day” he’s heard so much about, the bastard. He’s entrusted Farihah Zaman with his other assignment for the night, since she seems to really like it. He’s like to hear just why.
Southland (TNT, 10 p.m.): The episode is named “Heroes,” and we’re sure the show is going for a little David Bowie vibe—or maybe just the cover by the Wallflowers from the Godzilla soundtrack—but, man, Kevin McFarland heard that title and had visions of Suresh’s overwrought narration, and he screamed.
TV CLUB CLASSIC
TV Roundtable (1 a.m.): The 7th Heaven musical is one of the worst episodes of television Todd VanDerWerff has ever seen, so of course he subjected our panel to it, then laughed when they could barely make it through all 40-plus minutes. We’ve included lots of clips. See if you can watch them all!
Slings & Arrows (1 p.m.): Geoffrey finds himself fighting off challenges from both the spirit world and the people up on stage, as both Oliver and Henry Breedlove keep entreating him to just do the play as Oliver laid it out. Todd VanDerWerff frequently gets in arguments with the ghosts of previous TV editors.
WHAT ELSE IS ON
The Neighbors (ABC, 8:30 p.m.): We couldn’t let this season pass from the Earth without having somebody watch and review the finale. That task falls to Kenny Herzog, who may very well have been the first of our writers to quietly say the show was getting kind of okay last fall. Have fun, Kenny!
Whitney (NBC, 8:30 p.m.): We’re letting the second season of this pass unremarked upon, however. Pilot Viruet said she could do it, but we wanted her to cover something else, and after Last Man Standing, we just weren’t sure we could make her sit through any more second-season sitcom finales.
Nova (PBS, 9 p.m.): The meteor crashed to Earth just last month, but Nova is already on the ground, there to examine what happened when whatever it was slammed into Russian soil. Of course, since they work for the U.S. government, they’re just there to cover up the truth, but you knew all of that already.
The Real World (MTV, 10 p.m.): And here is how we chose to make Pilot Viruet spend her evening: with a bunch of college-aged kids who move into an apartment together and make you realize you’re getting too old for this shit. What’s On Tonight was too young for it when it debuted and too old for it now!
Enchanted (Disney, 8 p.m.): As a cartoon princess transported to our world to learn all about falling in love with one of our hu-man men—sure, that old yarn!—Amy Adams is incandescent, turning what would have been an enjoyable time-waster at best into something much more entertaining.
Jurassic Park (Encore, 8 p.m.): Go ahead. Sing it along with us: Bah bah BAH BAH BAH, bah bah BAH BAH BAH. Bah bah BAH. BAH BAH BAH. (You just keep repeating that as needed, or you loudly shout it every time a dinosaur shows up. It’s been known to sound great on a harmonium and keep T. Rexes in line.)
NBA Basketball: Heat at Bulls (ESPN, 8 p.m.): The Heat dismantled the Bulls last month, after the Bulls defeated the Heat back in January. The only question we have is: When is baseball coming back? Because we can only feign an interest in basketball for this feature for so long. C’mon, April!
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
The Shield (Tuesday): Hey, did you guys know that we’re doing classic reviews of The Shield, which you can watch, in its entirety, in several places online? And that, for whatever reason, you’re not reading these reviews, even though Brandon Nowalk is doing a great job? Get on that, Internet! Get on that.