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CBS tries to pretend it’s still airing I Love Lucy

Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Friday, December 20, and Saturday, December 21. All times are Eastern.

I Love Lucy Christmas Special (CBS, 8 p.m., Friday): What’s this? CBS has reanimated the corpses of the various I Love Lucy cast members and filmed a new episode with them? That’s the only possible explanation, right? The network wouldn’t go to the lengths of, say, dusting off an episode of television that’s over 50 years old at this point, colorizing it, then packaging it as something “new” and “special,” right? Well, this is CBS, so maybe the network’s core audience will wake up in the middle of this one, figure they’ve time traveled back to when they were only in their 70s and do a little jig. Hurrah! Hurrah for Christmas magic!


Comedy Bang! Bang! (IFC, 10 p.m., Friday): David Sims is the only person on regular TV Club coverage this weekend, because we forgot to tell him the rest of us were taking the holidays off. Nobody disturb him. We don’t want him to figure out the rest of us have left the office as he writes up this season finale.

Saturday Night Live (NBC, 11:30 p.m., Saturday): We’ve also “tricked” David Sims into covering this Christmas episode of the sketch-comedy show, but it wasn’t really a trick, because if there’s one thing David Sims loves more than working on holidays, it’s the musical stylings of Justin Timberlake.

Doctor Who (Classic) (3 p.m., Saturday): Christopher Bahn knows no one will be copy editing this article because we’re going to be too busy eating fruitcake, so he’s writing about an “alternate Ninth Doctor” and a “Doctor Who that could have been.” Sure, Christopher. Keep making stuff up. Just don’t bother us.


The Carrie Diaries/Nikita (The CW, 8 p.m., Friday): Not only is The CW new tonight, but Nikita, at least, will be new next week as well (and it’s the series finale, no less). If you’re looking for something to watch this evening, there are far worse options than AnnaSophia Robb and Maggie Q doing their thing.


Hawaii Five-0/Blue Bloods (CBS, 9 p.m., Friday): Or if you’re already home with your parents and looking for something to watch, then you could watch the CBS procedural lineup, which is also new. It won’t be new next week, though. That’s when you’re going to have to forage for new stuff for yourself.

Tanked (Animal Planet, 9 p.m. Friday): Even Tanked is doing a holiday special, though so far as we know, it’s not going to involve the network dusting off an old black-and-white episode of the show, colorizing it, then trying to kinda sorta pass it off as new content, because it’s the holidays, why not?


The Birthday Boys (IFC, 10:30 p.m., Friday): Don’t forget that this funny little sketch show is ending its own first season tonight, right after the Comedy Bang! Bang! finale. What will the show do for a big cliffhanger? We don’t actually know, but now we kind of hope it will have a big cliffhanger.

I Want A Dog For Christmas, Charlie Brown (ABC, 8 p.m., Saturday): Rerun, Rerun, Rerun. If you want a dog for Christmas, why are you asking Charlie Brown? He’s not going to be able to give the okay to get you a dog! You have to talk to your parents, the rarely heard from Mr. and Mrs. Van Pelt.


Too Cute! (Animal Planet, 9 p.m., Saturday): This show will also offer up a holiday special, with puppies and kittens celebrating their first Christmases. If David Sims has his way, he’ll drag Todd VanDerWerff back in to work just to make him review this, and he’ll quietly cackle the whole time he’s doing so.

Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgandy (TBS, 8 p.m., Friday): Far be it from us to suggest what might get you in the holiday spirit, but there are few things better than watching the greatest movie ever made with your friends and loved ones. Gather everybody ‘round the ol’ picture box and enjoy the show!


It’s A Wonderful Life  (NBC, 8 p.m., Friday): You guys know What’s On Tonight. You know we love this movie. And here’s NBC, hauling it out of mothballs again for your viewing enjoyment. Now: Imagine if this was a movie about a non-existent person who wished to exist! Go write that screenplay! Solid gold!

Cloud Atlas (HBO Signature, 9 p.m., Saturday): The Wachowskis and Tom Tykwer took David Mitchell’s supposedly unfilmable book and filmed the shit out of it. Whether you think it’s good—and What’s On Tonight is firmly on the side of this movie—is open to discussion. But it’s a fun one to argue over!


Women’s Hockey: U.S. vs. Canada (NBC Sports, 8 p.m., Friday): It’s time to revive one of the greatest rivalries in all of world sports as the Winter Olympics creep ever closer. Our brave, nobel American women, stoic and beautiful all, will face off a buncha brassy Canadian dames. Let us hope right prevails.

Glory Kickboxing (Spike, 9 p.m., Saturday): Could we highlight one of the handful of low stakes bowl games today? Sure, we could focus on the Famous Idaho Potato Bowl or the New Orleans Bowl, but c’mon, everybody! This is called GLORY KICKBOXING. Has there ever been a better name for anything?


The Returned (Thursday): The first season of this French import wraps up with more mystery than answers, a decision that drove some of its fans nuts. Erik Adams didn’t care, though. He liked the series’ choice to end on a bunch of cool enigmas. And in season two, they visit the flash-sideways universe!


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