Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Wednesday, May 22. All times are Eastern.
Modern Family (ABC, 9 p.m.): Season finales are just the time for everybody in the cast to take a trip, but perhaps the Pritchett-Dunphy-Tuckers would rather they not be traveling to Florida for such sad reasons. See, Phil’s mom has just died, and for some reason, the entire family, instead of just the Dunphy clan, decides to head down to America’s wang to pay their respects. Along the way, wacky things will happen, Emmys will be won, and Donna Bowman will bid adieu to this show—and the TV season—until the fall rolls ‘round again.
Don’t Trust The B—— In Apartment 23 (Hulu, 5 p.m.): After this show’s untimely cancellation, Emily Guendelsberger feared she would never see it again. Instead, the series has popped up online for a week or two, and Emily’s going to review the remaining episodes on Wednesdays, two at a time.
The Middle (ABC, 8 p.m.): Axl’s graduating, and we’re as surprised as the rest of the Heck family to see that he might actually make it out of school and head off to college. Then again, knowing this show, he’ll probably still live at home. Will Harris longs for the day Axl will move out of his basement already.
Nashville (ABC, 10 p.m.): If there’s one thing this show has been missing, it’s a performance by Brad Paisley, singing a duet with Connie Britton. Well, you’re going to get one tonight in tonight’s season finale, as Todd VanDerWerff breathes a sigh of relief at these hooligans leaving his TV for a while.
Psych (USA, 10 p.m.): The guys suspect a plastic surgeon of murder, but, sadly, this isn’t an hour-long homage to the Carver season of Nip/Tuck. If it were, maybe the ultimate villain could be revealed to be Ryan Murphy himself, clad in a strange porcelain mask. Kevin McFarland would watch that endlessly.
TV CLUB CLASSIC
TV Roundtable (12 p.m.): David Sims just joined the TV Roundtable team, and he’s already making his first pick, like he’s all grown up! Now, he picked an episode of Friends, so we had to have a bit of a talking to with him about that, but we were happy it used the word “boobies” right there in the title.
Slings & Arrows (1 p.m.): Is it already time for the series finale? Well, we’re sad to hear about that, but we’re also pleased to have spent the last 18 weeks with you, checking out this wonderful show. At least, Todd VanDerWerff hopes you were checking it out. He’ll have those of you who weren’t removed.
WHAT ELSE IS ON
MasterChef (Fox, 8 p.m.): We’re undecided as to whether we’ll pick up this summer perennial for another year at TV Club. Phil Dyess-Nugent would like you to watch tonight, because if you don’t, maybe we’ll drop it and he’ll be reduced to quietly begging for scraps as his lower lip quivers in deep sadness.
900 Pound Man: The Race Against Time/The Town That Caught Tourette’s (TLC, 9 p.m.): It would appear that TLC is pulling out all the stops for the final night of the TV season. Is it just us, or does The Town That Caught Tourette’s sound like the title of a particularly terrible Outer Limits episode?
Devoured: Man-eating Super Snake Returns (Animal Planet, 9 p.m.): This might be just us, but if we knew of a “man-eating super snake,” we almost assuredly would not let it “return.” That just seems like a recipe for somebody to, well, get devoured by a man-eating super snake. Again, it would seem.
Chicago Fire (NBC, 10 p.m.): This trauma drama steadily grew into the kind of performer NBC needed, and now, it’s going to get one of the network’s prized post-Voice slots for its second season. In the meantime, Carrie Raisler checks in on the first season finale of the show to see how it all wraps up.
Marmaduke (Fox Movie Channel, 8 p.m.): Something about the existence of this movie always made us quiver in terror, then think about how much we always enjoyed Joe Mathlete’s blog, Marmaduke Explained. Young Mr. Mathlete perfected a kind of comics strip snark few have succeeded at.
Tron (BBC America, 8 p.m.): FX has been showing the late-to-appear sequel fairly often in the last few weeks, and we sort of thought the Disney corporation had had the original dragged out back and shot. But nope. Here it is, in all its cheesy glory. Witness the film’s oddly convoluted, yet enjoyable plot!
NBA Playoff: Game 1: Pacers at Heat (TNT, 8:30 p.m.): Well, everybody who doesn’t live in southern Florida. It would seem you’re all about to become fans of the Indiana Pacers, because you’re not sure who else you can cheer for. We regret to inform you that in two weeks, you’re going to be disappointed.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
The Shield (Tuesday): We’ll be announcing a new Summer TV Club Classic schedule come Monday, but you’d better believe that we’re going to keep going with Brandon Nowalk’s excellent Shield reviews through the rest of the summer. Though it certainly would help if you guys would, uh, read them.