Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Monday, May 7. All times are Eastern.
2 Broke Girls (CBS, 8 p.m.): We’ve made it this far, America! And by “we’ve,” we mean that Todd VanDerWerff has made it this far, and the rest of us have watched in slack-jawed horror at first the man’s contortions and then his agony. And by “America,” we mean, “the readership of The A.V. Club, which is neither exclusively American, nor representative of that nation’s population at all.” And by “made it this far,” we mean that 2 Broke Girls’ first season is finally coming to an end with a… one-hour finale? Featuring Martha Stewart? Oh no. Oh no, no, no. Just one more, Todd! Play through the pain!
Adventure Time (Cartoon Network, 7:30 p.m.): “A bear cozies up to the guys, but its true intentions may be hidden,” says the plot description. Well of course its true intentions are hidden! Have you ever met a bear whose true intentions weren’t hidden? Oliver Sava did once at Bear Country, U.S.A.
The Voice (NBC, 8 p.m.): We’re down to the final four, and we’re placing bets on who’s going to win this whole thing. We think the only suitable answer to this is that we all know that Christina Aguilera has already lost her weird grudge feud with Tony Lucca. Emily Yoshida shakes her head at this pettiness.
House (Fox, 8 p.m.): Back when we first started covering House, it was Noel Murray who wrote the reviews. After a while, he decided he wasn’t sure he had anything else to say about the show, and he handed them off to Zack Handlen. Tonight, Noel returns for one last episode before the show ends.
Castle (ABC, 10 p.m.): Season finale time! Looks like tonight’s episode might finally, finally move things forward between Castle and Beckett. Of course, we’ve heard that a number of times before, and every time Phil Dyess-Nugent chooses to believe it, the producers play him like a sucker. He’s done with it!
Lost Girl (Syfy, 10 p.m.): Kenzi drunkenly summons a witch. Because that’s the best time to summon a witch, right? When you’re drunk. Kevin McFarland has never really understood why drunk people don’t try to summon more beings who could crush them in the magical palms of their magical hands.
Smash (NBC, 10 p.m.): Turnabout is fair play: Since Noel’s handling House duties this evening, Zack Handlen is dropping in on Smash, and we’re guessing he’ll be grateful he’s only had to put up with the wacky times over on House. Unless there’s another Bollywood number. Zack loves Bollywood.
TV CLUB CLASSIC
Scrubs (11 a.m.): Ryan Reynolds drops by Sacred Heart for the second season finale, and Myles McNutt’s coverage of the sitcom goes away for a while. Just like Myles, Ryan Reynolds is a friendly Canadian who came to our shores and found our acceptance. Also just like Myles, he once dated Alanis Morissette.
Batman: The Animated Series (1 p.m.): Ra’s al Ghul? Jonah Hex? A transcontinental blimp? Now, we know you probably assumed we were describing this week’s episode of Cougar Town when we mentioned those three things, but if you’ll let Oliver Sava talk, he’ll tell you where they really go.
WHAT ELSE IS ON
World’s Wildest Police Videos (Spike, 8 p.m.): This is not only a show with enough content to fill a full hour of primetime programming, but it’s a show that’s apparently popular enough to have filled multiple seasons worth of episodes, with a new one starting tonight. No one ever went broke, etc.
Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (Travel Channel, 8 p.m.): Our avuncular host travels to Japan for the “Cook It Raw” festival, which seems like an oxymoron to us. Anyway, we’re going to guess that he tastes some of this food that’s been cooked raw and really likes it. That’s just how he rolls nowadays.
Motorcity (Disney XD, 9 p.m.): We haven’t seen this show, but we imagine if we had, we’d be obsessed with it. It’s a new, animated series about a futuristic Detroit that’s owned by an evil billionaire. The only way to fight back against him is to find the hidden auto-utopia of Motorcity and drive awesome cars.
Conan (TBS, 11 p.m.): Conan O’Brien has a talk with Metta “Ron Artest” World Peace, in the wake of his most recent suspension. We’re going to guess that the host has a field day with the basketball star, but it’s also possible the two have a frank discussion about world hunger. You never know.
Scream 4 (Showtime 2, 8 p.m.): Despite the ‘90s nostalgia driven part of ourselves that also wanted to see American Reunion, we didn’t ever get over to theaters to see this one. So tell us, horror fans: Is this a suitable continuation of the series? Or was the series never that good to begin with? (Don’t tell us that.)
West Side Story (TCM, 10 p.m.): Someday, we’re finally going to get that TV Club production of West Side off the ground, and it will be even better than the very good film version, which won something like 50 billion Oscars. Of course, ours will be performed entirely in the little round room by cover bands.
MLB Baseball: Mets at Phillies (ESPN, 7 p.m.): The Mets have a winning record—just barely. The Phillies have a losing record—just barely. So this series between the two East Coast rivals could swap their fortunes, just like in one of the many movies where Lindsay Lohan swaps something with someone.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
Game Of Thrones (Sunday): Haven’t read the books this series is based on? Well, have no fear, because David Sims’ newbies reviews are here to help you. Have you read those books? Then Todd VanDerWerff has his experts reviews for you to read. Don’t care? Well, there’s always Bob’s Burgers.